No.30- A Sham Of A Skyrim Marriage

"Hey there good look'n!"

 Role playing, means pretending you're someone you are not- yup... A life of adventure- yup... A different gender if desired- yup!... The savior of the realm- Big YUP!... You can get married and have a relationship- *Loud buzzer sound*, Nope!

Lilgalad & Lydia

The state of personal relationships in Skyrim are entirely imaginary, as I have suggested in the early entries of this journal with Lydia, but since they took the time to create an institution called marriage, I had a hope there might be something more, something a little fun and worthwhile, a spouse and some advantages for having a spouse- affection, love, (even if it is imagined) sex, sharing a bed, a hot breakfast, etc. Kids? Hmm, have to think about that. The realistic informed part of me knew most of the above was not to be. It's just not in the dialog, but come on, there should be something more than just a meal and an extra rest benefit from sleeping in close proximity with your "love" who you hardly knew, which is not all it could be by a long shot!

How about some interesting dialog options? Or some quests, like run into town to buy some supplies? Or a spouse quest chain which includes intrigue, you have to help her out of a jam that includes one or two affection animations and some flirting?

The sad truth is something called marriage does exist in Skyrim, but it's mostly a meaningless institution, a matter of doing someone a favor, or not, flash a "I'm available" necklace and apparently the eligible ones are so hard up, forget the small talk, if stopped on the street they will ask, "You're interested in me?"  And if the answer is "yes", they are ready to get hitched in an instant and it does not matter what gender. But maybe I'm seeing it through the prism of being a desirable Dragonborn, EVERYONE wants to marry me! This could go to my head! ;)

There is a long list of eligible people advertised in the "Skyrim Personals". I'm roll-playing a female elf so first stop was to check out the bachelors. The ones who own property are limited and what a sorry looking lot they are- old, worn out fuddy-duddys There are a couple of beef cake Nords out there (Argis The Bulwark in Markarth, Balimund of Riften, and Sorex Vinius, who runs the Winking Skeever in Solitude for example) with no property, no desirable property, or they are living in a pub/inn.

In contrast there are some attractive women who own property and/or are merchants such as Ysolda in Whiterun, (merchant and owns a house) and Sylgja, with the help of the Cover Girl Mod, could be the prettiest female in Skyrim and owns a house in the mining town of Shor's Stone. The problem with Ysolda is that in Whiterun, I've all ready acquired quite nice accommodations, my own suite in fact at the Companion's Guild so I was hoping to find someone with a house and/or business in another city. It's called being Skyrim pragmatic!

So let me tell you a marriage story. One day I was passing through the town of Shor's Stone on my first trip to Riften and there she was, an incredible beauty, on a par if not better than Lydia, (who is un-marriageable). However as a Housecarl to my Thane, Lydia shares my life, my fights, my imagined snuggle times, and is a good companion as far as companions are allowed to be.

Slygja

Anyway, Slygja was a true vision. I engaged her in talk, finding out she is a strong independent lady miner at the Red Belly Mine, not 100' from her house. I had no idea how independent she really was. She asked me if I could deliver a package to her Dad in a nearby town. I did and she was grateful. That is the sum total of our interaction.

A couple days later I came back to Shor's Stone wearing the "I'm Looking For Love" Amulet of Mara on my neck and right to the point, she says to me, "seeing as how life is short, live it to the fullest", was I interested in her?

"Sure" I gulped and she came back with "So it's settled! Go make arrangements for the ceremony!"

"I...ok" I replied, the image of a honeymoon flashed in my head, a second companion to share my life with, a house thrown in, all the while knowing I had a Redo Spell (game save) in my pocket! This was well worth the risk. I looked at Lydia, expecting "I don't like the looks of this!", but she had no comment and did not seem to be bothered. In fact she seemed to approve of Sly.

You Could of Left the Pick Axe at Home

I hustled back to The Temple of Mara in Riften, made the arrangements and was told to come back the next day for the ceremony, which Lydia and I did. At the ceremony, there she was, Sly in her standard mining gear and her pick axe hung on her belt. Without any talk or demonstrative displays of affection we stood there as the Priest said the special words, and we were hitched. But before he even finished talking, Sly made an about face and without a word, casually walked out!

Arms Crossed- What Do You Want?

 "Where you going, honey?" I shouted. Bursting through the doors of the Temple into the sunlight, she was gone. We fast traveled to Shor's Stone and I tried her house. The door was locked.  I went looking for her in the mine and found her working. When I engaged her in conversation, she did call me "her love", but other than deciding we could live in her house for now, she had work to do, end of conversation. So I waited and became frustrated with the passage of time. I knew, but I should have known, this girl LIVES in the mine.

The real problem was my expectations of something in so-called marriage that resembled friendship. She finally came home, entered her house, then emerged to sit by the public fire pit and chat with the other town folk as she probably has her entire life, not even bothering to tell them she got married or introducing me, the new gal hanging out. The townsfolk were oblivious or did not not care either. This honey moon was getting off to a lousy start. I was able to get her to fix me a meal, but the best was yet to come.

At bed time, I finally could get into her house, which is nothing fancy, but it's a house, one of my marriage parameters. I eyed the full size bed with anticipation, but without a tour, without some normal honeymoon chit chat, without any words about getting settled, not even a "good night", she walked to the bed and laid down in her grubby mining clothes, *including* the mining pick and fell asleep! Why did I suddenly imagine a pick between my eyes?

Disappointed!

You Can't Sleep When Being Asked to Leave! (Click pic)

Ok, so I went to the other side of the bed and tried to lay down but got a message, "You can't sleep when being asked to leave!", GAHH! Now maybe it would be better if I invited her to a house I own and sleep in the same bed with her, even if I kept my hands to myself? Could she be happy if I took her away from her town, her life, and her mine, not that she showed any more emotions than the rocks she quarries?

Sigh! It was time for plan B.  I pulled out my Redo Spell and pushed the button whisking me and Lydia back to the pre-Sly marriage point. This particular experiment in marriage Skyrim style is over. I can always go back to Sly if I change my mind, but for now I'll seek out a merchant, living in town to hook up with. I might have the perfect candidate, but I'll reveal that later.

Here is the point. I have imagined some personal interactions in my journal entries, but when Skyrim allows something called marriage, I expect a little more, or why bother? For the rest benefit of sleeping in proximity of a spouse, it seems to be a chore, especially when they are asking you to leave, but maybe I just don't know how to be Skyrim married?